The way home from anxiety

The way home from anxiety

I first met David Whyte many years ago (thanks to Richard Strozzi-Heckler at Strozzi Institute) and I am an admirer. I find myself captivated by his words, both spoken and written, often pausing podcasts to jot down some of his musings. One stopped me in my tracks...
Time to Pause

Time to Pause

Sometimes I wonder if my clients get sick of me saying “let’s pause, let’s take a breath” because I know I say it a lot. A Lot. Neuroscientists can tell us all about the benefit of settling the autonomic nervous system, calming the arousal in the sympathetic to the...
Beyond the standard reframe….

Beyond the standard reframe….

Most clients in therapy have been offered the good old reframe. It goes something like this: “so I hear you describe your teenager stomps around the house, ignores your requests and seems disrespectful [client nods] so I wonder if there’s anything else going on here?...
I Won’t Interrupt…

I Won’t Interrupt…

“Perhaps the most important thing we bring to another person is the silence in us, not the sort of silence that is filled with unspoken criticism or hard withdrawal. The sort of silence that is a place of refuge, of rest, of acceptance of someone as they are. We are...
Now what?

Now what?

“How are you?” I asked. “A bit blah” replied my client, “it feels like same old, same old, if only something interesting or exciting would happen! I want to change something but I don’t know what I want to change.” Resonate for you? It did for me. My own routine of...
Are you someone who processes deeply?

Are you someone who processes deeply?

If this question has your attention, I’m guessing you’re someone who already knows you prefer time and space to process deeply. I’ve always known I’m like that – it’s mostly what I call a super power, and admittedly, sometimes feels limiting (so I avoid...
Synergy

Synergy

“BODYSET!” exploded spontaneously from my mouth. “I have never used that word before!” “Quick” she said, “write it down.” I paused to look for pen and paper, none to hand, and I already knew this was a word I’d remember with ease. It had such resonance, like a gift...
Happy?

Happy?

The holiday season has arrived and with it, for many of us, comes inordinate pressure to spend happy meaningful time with family who may, or may not, be our first choice for company. I’m struck by the happy smiling faces featured in all the advertisements at this time...
EXHAUSTICATED

EXHAUSTICATED

All but one or two of my clients have transferred our work to zoom since the beginning of the pandemic. I’ve really appreciated the comparatively low-effort it takes to work from a home office set up to meet my needs (and ideally my wants) – I’m annoyingly picky...

Why everyone is important

I love this quote. “In life, you will realize there is a role for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you, some will love you, and some with teach you. But the ones who are truly important are the ones who bring out the best in you. They...