“You must constantly ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then ask yourself the big question: Is that okay?” Jim Rohn

I so appreciate synchronicity. This quote was forwarded by a friend who knew I had just spent a difficult weekend with a family member who could win an award for negativity. [Shudder] That’s not to say I don’t have my own negative times – I do, we all do – but I do strive for the positive. Not in a Pollyana way, but in a glass half full rather than glass half empty way.

My mood going into the weekend had been pretty upbeat following a rewarding and satisfying week with clients woven with fun, creative strands of me-time. So I felt resourced and prepared for the negative onslaught. I underestimated the power of their infection – hour after hour of “woe is me and thee” and I felt drained and sluggish.

In the aftermath though, I’m feeling quite grateful for the opportunity to reflect on just who else I may be around who is having an effect, albeit less dramatic. There’s a really upbeat person at the library who always greets me with a welcoming smile; my Pilates teacher is friendly, warm and full of useful suggestions; the guy who takes care of my dry cleaning is a gem. Positive, cheering, people to keep being around. On the other hand, those who display judgment of self and others, are selfish or disrespectful, gossip, are indirect or inauthentic – all the personality traits I can be drawn into and have a deep commitment to avoid.

If I want to be self-accepting, upbeat, successful, timely, respectful of self and others….then people with those personality traits are the best ones to hang out with. Not rocket science, but worthy of pausing to consider with who I’m spending my time. How about you?